tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8743841912028246535.post5202267481872879285..comments2023-10-10T06:48:40.299-03:00Comments on the feminist librarian: booknotes: straightannajcookhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17573723390785613915noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8743841912028246535.post-32292712112620593782012-03-28T21:13:50.025-03:002012-03-28T21:13:50.025-03:00Yes, totally, let's!Yes, totally, let's!Mollyhttp://www.firsttheegg.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8743841912028246535.post-89025741791038447192012-03-27T17:29:59.140-03:002012-03-27T17:29:59.140-03:00@Molly ... thanks so much for your thoughtful comm...@Molly ... thanks so much for your thoughtful comment and musings! At some point, after things have settled for you and your family post-birth, it would be fun to do some sort of interview/conversation on this topic together as two women of the same age who both experience a more fluid sexual identity. It would be really interesting to compare similarities and differences concerning social pressure and expectation, given how the external shape of our lives (parenting, partnership, geographic location) are different in a lot of ways ... yet I think somehow our approach to those external differences has a lot in common!annajcookhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17573723390785613915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8743841912028246535.post-10923117546206396022012-03-27T16:38:11.896-03:002012-03-27T16:38:11.896-03:00I love everything you write on the topic of sexual...I love everything you write on the topic of sexual identity and fluidity, in part because I don't identify as straight ... but I don't feel like I'm 'allowed' to identify as anything else, either. I mean, look at me! I'm a cisgendered woman married to a cisgendered man, reproducing up a storm, and I've only ever dated or had sex with men. And yet I'm not straight, my fantasies aren't straight, my relationship with my gender (or with gender itself) isn't as normal as my skirts and long hair make it look, and I doubt my sexual and social lives would stay so 'straight'-looking in the event that something somehow ended my totally delightful and fulfilling marriage.<br /><br />So I just describe myself as "heterosexually-partnered," which is problematic. It begs the question and allows people to 'read ' me as straight and retains all my considerable privilege as a 'straight,' married mother. But it also avoids appropriating the histories and experiences of people whose actual problems in the world never threaten me: it seems disingenuous to say aloud "I'm queer," given what my life looks like. I dunno--our culture is so into labels and yes/no answers that it's tricky to articulate the grey areas, I guess.Mollyhttp://www.firsttheegg.comnoreply@blogger.com